on january 21 , three days ago , he had writen ." it is better not to care ?" yesterday , he wrote ." i feel that don't really exist . i look in the mirror and i i am not sure who i am looking at ."
i closed th notebook and noly then , saw the yellow post it note stuck to the front ." private ," it said in nathan 's handwriting .
that made me smile . if the notebook was that provate why did he not hide it more securely ? answere : he wished me to read it . it was a challenge and i took it up . i went downstauirs , found a pen , and wrote underneath ." talk to me , nathan ?"
the candles i had placed on the table guttered , nathan ate the salmon with mushrooma slowly ." not bad ."
not bad ? every mouthful had cost a fortune . i swalloewd the final piece on the plate as if it were gold dust and said ." one day i will learn to cook ."
nathan uttered a snort midway between laughter and deision ." it not you . minty ."
upstairs , there was an an eruption . despite the direct warnins , the twins were swapping beds , as they did most nights . nathan cocked an ear ." it 's fine ," i reassured jhim ." tell me what's happening at vistemax .i talked to gisela yeasterday and she mentioned that roger is ultrapreoccupied . i thought you had had a good year ?"
food half eaten , nathan pushed away his plate ." a big libel suit ." he confessed ." it was an article in weeken digest about bribes for football managers . it is likely to cost vistermax and it happened on my watch ."
" but not your fault ."
"not directly . my responsibility , though .
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